Thanks so much for doing this--trying to get back into my craft after a long hiatus.
If I may ask a quick question? Do you prefer a google doc link? The prose itself in the email body? Thank you! (I've never had my stuff edited much less by a pro so I'm grateful for the opportunity, fr fr)
I transfer to google doc or if you send me a google doc I make a copy, rename it, and then send it back if you get autopsied. If you don't end up on the slab, barring immediate possible homelessness due to weather, you'll still get a short pass and notes because I like what I do.
Etsablish authority and you can do whatever you want. This is not something that came from me originally, I’m just passing down the knowledge through another stream. But establish authority and you can do whatever you want with the reader.
Thank you, I guess, uhh, join us again next Friday for another installment of… invitation to an Autopsy (now where did I crib the title of the series as a play off from?)
This was truly enlightening and absolutely fascinating to read the story through in one go, then once again referring to the notes. Your explanations are so detailed and informative and the knowledge you share is invaluable. Thank you, Emil.
Kudos to Melissa for sharing her flash for you to review. Hmmmm. I’m tempted now’s
Thank you, I plan on doing it every week. Just, with more lead time so I don’t have to be up doing the pass until 2am, and the post can drop when people are less, “end of day, go to hell.” (For when I dropped it, I did not expect such a large response.)
If you’re a dev editor none of it would shock you anyway most likely. Possibly some of the usual inter editor squabbles and nitpickery though. But that’s inevitable. Thanks for reading the intro though! And I always like to include something lovely and weird. Like a friend says “we may not have the most money compared to some of our old friends who decided not to be writers, but funny enough, we have the BEST stories at parties. Gee, wonder why.” (also, yeah, it’s got 81 inline comments I think? So, I don’t blame anyone who does the same work for not reading it.)
Why thank you. Bring me your most abused piece of work and I’ll send you back half an MFA in a can. I really love pieces like this because I can gauge where they are in their practice and then it’s my job to work with them while they’re working on their voice and style while not infecting it too much.
If I’m working with someone who speaks essentially the same language and writes in the same general modality there’s much, much more shorthand.
Elle Nash’s crits in her last workshop were both short and concise because we both cut our teeth in the same conceptual places and spaces, so she could just leave a note short as, “on the body” or “Sensory” or “Tense slip/authority”, and I’d see what she meant almost immediately, which always makes me feel sorta dumb. But then again, if you’re ever the smartest person in the room, find a bigger room.
excellent reminder that writing is an art, oh my god. very interesting read. (yes i'm astutely aware of my lack of capitalization, please don't shoot me)
Stylistic decision, I'd let it stand. I'm not a proofreader or an exceptionally stuffy copyeditor (though I can play the part well enough if you hand me the style guide) and in fiction there are much larger more interesting fish to fry.
It's also worth noting that I'm not a prescriptive linguist or grammarian. Did the signal you want to get through, get through? Was it communicated and received how you intended? Are you satisfied with the end results? This is what I care about, not lack of capitalization.
(my Substack is named after a technique where you intentionally sya something rong as a literary device.)
i like that. i've only encountered editors in an academic setting and it's just such a different experience. they always feel more like a hurdle to pass than someone that's on your team trying to improve the text. (granted, it's almost impossible to textually change much in scientific papers because every conclusion is hedged to the gods so a single word change might upset the authors)
Fuck, scientific papers… I’ve seen this game in real time. Stupidly painful back and forth over the stupidest shit. An editor you hire though, for fiction, if they’re not on your side drop ‘em like a steaming hot pile of shit. And if your writing is in a fundamental way underbaked and not ready for anything but vanity or self pub because of a deficiency in skill, knowledge, or the story fundamentally does not work, it’s the editor’s job to not take the manuscript on, not take your money, and gently set you down about where you are as a writer. (This is an art in and of itself because there’s always the narcissistic “I have READ Bukowski and SOME Palahiuk, but he was mids. I AM A GENIUS AND THE WORLD NEEDS MY STORY!” guy who doesn’t want editorial anything, they just want validation. But validation isn’t in the core job description for someone who does dev and line editing.)
This is now a weekly feature, more lead time though. Hopefully it works more than once. I’m pretty sure every story you edit produces completely different questions, solutions, and insights.
What's the knowledge worth without sharing it? It's part of the work. And you know what I say "there is always the work" the second half of which is "and the work is never finished." But we whisper that under our breath like a prayer.
Thank you for taking time to break everything down. Wow!
Emil, you’re so fucking cool, kind and talented.
I gotta re-wire my brain. I’m painfully longwinded, desperately wishing to be concise. Remembering your comments will propel me. Footnote #22 made my laugh so hard. Many footnotes made me laugh and smile. I’m taking in every footnote, soooo helpful.
I’m grateful for this masterclass highlighting areas outside my awareness: bad instances of reportage, low/mid/high brow dialogue switching, Big voice authority, Dryer’s English elimination list, economy of words (well this I’ve heard of but haven’t mastered obv). Looking forward to reading the article you are emailing me, thank you!
I loved learning more backstory about yourself and encounter with Chuck Palahniuk.
I’m so pumped. You’ve opened my mind, expanded my tool kit, and provided important training frameworks to help me level up. Excited for the series and future autopsys.
Footnote 50, I’m missing a line that’s supposed to go before the block of historical sword facts which would be “[TL;DR: sword history]”. Original intention being reader can skip the history lesson unless they wanna nerd out/be bored to tears. It’s my least fav part of the story to read to myself/out loud - I just wanna read TL;DR: sword history, then skip the rest. In my mind it was to make a point about its longevity but contrast how modern day is starkly different to all past use. That’s an obvious point to anyone though so I get that it doesn’t have to be stated, especially as a block of text. Thanks for the honestly, invaluable for me to be aware of what simply won’t ever land well.
The opening line clarification: Protag is making a metaphor about how modern society castrates you from instinct, and he goes on to make case that he’s chosen to listen to his instincts, regardless how crazy it makes him seem.
Thank you for the kind words! I really give a shit, and I loved this story. It wasn't explicitly a metaphor in the opening, but I don't think you have to make it more explicit. I would leave it at that and work on the rest of the piece in another draft. Thank you for the insight into the sword history, but that's such a great way to establish your authority and also, give history, and like I said, what would a fact or small sentence about a rapier mean if it came directly after or during his argument with his wife? You can state things like that blankly.
"arguing" A German Zwiehander sword in the hands of a skilled swordsman in (year) could cleave a man in half. "more arguing."
"his retort"
This is a patented minimalist technique, and it works best in short fiction and short novels. If you pull it off, it works amazingly well, if you botch it, you botch it. Palahniuk absolutely ABUSED it in the novels that are considered generally to be his best (first six or so pubs, up until Rant, which was the end of that era, he started going more experimentalist and strayed from formal minimalism after that. Gee, wonder why everyone likes them? Did you know you can swallow a pint of blood before you get sick?)
Can't wait to see the next draft. I like this guy and his weird sword fetish.
Thanks so much for doing this--trying to get back into my craft after a long hiatus.
If I may ask a quick question? Do you prefer a google doc link? The prose itself in the email body? Thank you! (I've never had my stuff edited much less by a pro so I'm grateful for the opportunity, fr fr)
I transfer to google doc or if you send me a google doc I make a copy, rename it, and then send it back if you get autopsied. If you don't end up on the slab, barring immediate possible homelessness due to weather, you'll still get a short pass and notes because I like what I do.
What an enlightening read. I'll definitely follow this series.
The most important thing that I'm left with is the "authoritative voice".
Etsablish authority and you can do whatever you want. This is not something that came from me originally, I’m just passing down the knowledge through another stream. But establish authority and you can do whatever you want with the reader.
Glad you enjoyed the autopsy.
this is awesome emil! I learned so much.
Thank you, I guess, uhh, join us again next Friday for another installment of… invitation to an Autopsy (now where did I crib the title of the series as a play off from?)
This was truly enlightening and absolutely fascinating to read the story through in one go, then once again referring to the notes. Your explanations are so detailed and informative and the knowledge you share is invaluable. Thank you, Emil.
Kudos to Melissa for sharing her flash for you to review. Hmmmm. I’m tempted now’s
What a gift.
Thank you, I plan on doing it every week. Just, with more lead time so I don’t have to be up doing the pass until 2am, and the post can drop when people are less, “end of day, go to hell.” (For when I dropped it, I did not expect such a large response.)
Didn't read the autopsy, I admit. Fellow dev editor here, btw. LOVED the Palaniuk anecdote. Lovely and weird, just as I'd hoped.
If you’re a dev editor none of it would shock you anyway most likely. Possibly some of the usual inter editor squabbles and nitpickery though. But that’s inevitable. Thanks for reading the intro though! And I always like to include something lovely and weird. Like a friend says “we may not have the most money compared to some of our old friends who decided not to be writers, but funny enough, we have the BEST stories at parties. Gee, wonder why.” (also, yeah, it’s got 81 inline comments I think? So, I don’t blame anyone who does the same work for not reading it.)
Okay . This is fucking gold. Learned so much
Why thank you. Bring me your most abused piece of work and I’ll send you back half an MFA in a can. I really love pieces like this because I can gauge where they are in their practice and then it’s my job to work with them while they’re working on their voice and style while not infecting it too much.
If I’m working with someone who speaks essentially the same language and writes in the same general modality there’s much, much more shorthand.
Elle Nash’s crits in her last workshop were both short and concise because we both cut our teeth in the same conceptual places and spaces, so she could just leave a note short as, “on the body” or “Sensory” or “Tense slip/authority”, and I’d see what she meant almost immediately, which always makes me feel sorta dumb. But then again, if you’re ever the smartest person in the room, find a bigger room.
Whenever writing is involved , I’m never the smartest . And I’ll have work for you soon
This is what Substack needs.
excellent reminder that writing is an art, oh my god. very interesting read. (yes i'm astutely aware of my lack of capitalization, please don't shoot me)
Stylistic decision, I'd let it stand. I'm not a proofreader or an exceptionally stuffy copyeditor (though I can play the part well enough if you hand me the style guide) and in fiction there are much larger more interesting fish to fry.
It's also worth noting that I'm not a prescriptive linguist or grammarian. Did the signal you want to get through, get through? Was it communicated and received how you intended? Are you satisfied with the end results? This is what I care about, not lack of capitalization.
(my Substack is named after a technique where you intentionally sya something rong as a literary device.)
i like that. i've only encountered editors in an academic setting and it's just such a different experience. they always feel more like a hurdle to pass than someone that's on your team trying to improve the text. (granted, it's almost impossible to textually change much in scientific papers because every conclusion is hedged to the gods so a single word change might upset the authors)
Fuck, scientific papers… I’ve seen this game in real time. Stupidly painful back and forth over the stupidest shit. An editor you hire though, for fiction, if they’re not on your side drop ‘em like a steaming hot pile of shit. And if your writing is in a fundamental way underbaked and not ready for anything but vanity or self pub because of a deficiency in skill, knowledge, or the story fundamentally does not work, it’s the editor’s job to not take the manuscript on, not take your money, and gently set you down about where you are as a writer. (This is an art in and of itself because there’s always the narcissistic “I have READ Bukowski and SOME Palahiuk, but he was mids. I AM A GENIUS AND THE WORLD NEEDS MY STORY!” guy who doesn’t want editorial anything, they just want validation. But validation isn’t in the core job description for someone who does dev and line editing.)
the lack of capitals in me sees the lack of capitals in you
This is incredible! I learned so much, I'm going to read it all again tomorrow and maybe I'll take some notes. Thank you, Emil.
This is now a weekly feature, more lead time though. Hopefully it works more than once. I’m pretty sure every story you edit produces completely different questions, solutions, and insights.
I’m saving this to read later when there’s daylight. I can’t think of a better thing to read on a snow day. Looking forward to it!
Amazing as an amateur writer to see such insightful notes, thanks for posting it.
Also kudos to Melissa for having a great piece to dissect!
Open for submissions every Monday from now until the world explodes. Glad you liked it!
amazing you're doing all this Emil—fucking super
What's the knowledge worth without sharing it? It's part of the work. And you know what I say "there is always the work" the second half of which is "and the work is never finished." But we whisper that under our breath like a prayer.
Just finished reading everything, holy shit!!!
Thank you for taking time to break everything down. Wow!
Emil, you’re so fucking cool, kind and talented.
I gotta re-wire my brain. I’m painfully longwinded, desperately wishing to be concise. Remembering your comments will propel me. Footnote #22 made my laugh so hard. Many footnotes made me laugh and smile. I’m taking in every footnote, soooo helpful.
I’m grateful for this masterclass highlighting areas outside my awareness: bad instances of reportage, low/mid/high brow dialogue switching, Big voice authority, Dryer’s English elimination list, economy of words (well this I’ve heard of but haven’t mastered obv). Looking forward to reading the article you are emailing me, thank you!
I loved learning more backstory about yourself and encounter with Chuck Palahniuk.
I’m so pumped. You’ve opened my mind, expanded my tool kit, and provided important training frameworks to help me level up. Excited for the series and future autopsys.
Footnote 50, I’m missing a line that’s supposed to go before the block of historical sword facts which would be “[TL;DR: sword history]”. Original intention being reader can skip the history lesson unless they wanna nerd out/be bored to tears. It’s my least fav part of the story to read to myself/out loud - I just wanna read TL;DR: sword history, then skip the rest. In my mind it was to make a point about its longevity but contrast how modern day is starkly different to all past use. That’s an obvious point to anyone though so I get that it doesn’t have to be stated, especially as a block of text. Thanks for the honestly, invaluable for me to be aware of what simply won’t ever land well.
The opening line clarification: Protag is making a metaphor about how modern society castrates you from instinct, and he goes on to make case that he’s chosen to listen to his instincts, regardless how crazy it makes him seem.
Thank you for the kind words! I really give a shit, and I loved this story. It wasn't explicitly a metaphor in the opening, but I don't think you have to make it more explicit. I would leave it at that and work on the rest of the piece in another draft. Thank you for the insight into the sword history, but that's such a great way to establish your authority and also, give history, and like I said, what would a fact or small sentence about a rapier mean if it came directly after or during his argument with his wife? You can state things like that blankly.
"arguing" A German Zwiehander sword in the hands of a skilled swordsman in (year) could cleave a man in half. "more arguing."
"his retort"
This is a patented minimalist technique, and it works best in short fiction and short novels. If you pull it off, it works amazingly well, if you botch it, you botch it. Palahniuk absolutely ABUSED it in the novels that are considered generally to be his best (first six or so pubs, up until Rant, which was the end of that era, he started going more experimentalist and strayed from formal minimalism after that. Gee, wonder why everyone likes them? Did you know you can swallow a pint of blood before you get sick?)
Can't wait to see the next draft. I like this guy and his weird sword fetish.